In partnership with Forbes Books
The central focus of wealth preservation should not be to preserve wealth, but to fund a clearly defined purpose. A purpose to develop and maintain family, thereby growing a healthy community, and ultimately a flourishing society. Once a wealthy family discovers its collective purpose, then and only then does the preservation of their wealth become meaningful.
Family Forward
Close-knit businesses describe the unity of their workplace as being “like a family.” However, few families describe the unity of their home as being “like a business.” Somehow, we innately know that family represents the pinnacle of meaningful relationships.
My Focus
My own mistakes have informed my unyielding focus on family. As an investor and accountant, I like order. I like introducing logic to chaotic matters. I like answers. However, family is not friendly to a bookkeeping approach. Rules and regulations don’t help when a child is going through a challenging time. And this may be the reason so many well-meaning parents default to figuring things out on the fly, saying, “There’s no manual for parenthood.” Actually, there are manuals; we just haven’t leveraged them to help us be better parents.
For me, everything changed when I began using what I learned at work to create a blueprint for my family at home. Creating a family motto in our home gave us a collective purpose. Establishing three family values gave us daily inspiration. Individual goals helped us understand what each of us needed to thrive. With these items in place, it now feels like our family will never truly die. I will, but my family won’t.
Doorposts of the Heart
All I am trying to say is that slight changes in our perspectives can have magical effects on the present and the future. In my work, I find that most families have a clear mission to donate to philanthropic causes. When I stand back and ask why this is so popular, it is because the charitable organization represents a clear purpose, a stated objective, and a targeted group or person to benefit. Everything is clear. The money isn’t aimless. It is a tool on a mission. Our families should have the same clarity, purpose, and stated mission as the organizations to whom we give.
The process for a family does not need to be complex. Write down three words that define what you deem most important and in order of importance. This is your family motto. Next, write out three to five values that you want to teach your children and that you hope they will adopt when they are independent.
The last step is to write down annual family goals that reflect your family motto and values. Talk about these items informally as you save your best strategic thinking for your family. Once done with enough repetition, you won’t need family meetings to remind members of your motto and values. These should be written on the doorpost of their hearts.
The Purpose of Purpose
I imagine a day when everything I’ve worked for is passed on to the people I love most. What I hope they’ll find isn’t just money but the culmination of years of thought and planning they can replicate in their own family units. I have committed myself to leaving nothing without direction. Every resource will carry a purpose, and that purpose will carry the hearts of my wife and me forward.
If each of my four children’s households, once they have started their own family unit, had their own uniquely developed motto, values, and goals, I would be leaving them the greatest gift, which is a generational equipping model.
Generational Equipping Model:
- I first do it.
- I then do it with my children.
- Then, they do it.
- They then do it with their children.
Isn’t that the purpose of our purpose? To begin in our lives something so meaningful that it does not end with our death. But until my last day, I want to live so that my children desire my input on the lives of their children. That, my friend, is family-forward.